sneaking on-line shopping....

just became a victim again.
by oldnavy.com
they seem to have a really good sale on line right now, which means wasted time online. and my bankcard crying.

i limited myself to three items. one grey turtleneck, a jade colored trapeze dress, and a cute polka dot trapeze shirt.... i am really liking the fall selections for fashion this year.

empire waistlines make me think of "pride and prejudice" and they elegantly hide my tummy, while giving me some more definition to what little boobage i have.
and trapeze dresses are just cute.. with alot of body room.

the colors make me happy... and for one brief moment i am looking forward to colder weather. which means snug and cozy clothes, scarves, and boots. i need a new pair by the way.
one less excuse to shave, but then again one more HUGE excuse to start applying lotion everyday. poo.

that brief moment of wanting change will pass soon, and then i will be grumbling and moaning about the treacherous freeze that is going to fall upon us in no time at all.
and then be whining for summer breezes and short sleeves to come back.
but till then i will enjoy every moment of my non-shaving season...boots...and jumpers.

ps...
fish i got a plaid jumper and i LOVE it.... i was going to get another from old navy but restrained myself.

it is raining right now. the rain is sweet right now, real sweet.
sweet rain is the best, when one is pondering over the things of life and feeling emo.

i was never a harsh emo. but there are some small inkling bits of emo tendencies that lie within in me. if you give me some sappy music, rain, and some time alone to muse...it gives me the perfect recipe for my darker side to emerge.

my emo side would want to write poetry, knit in crazy colors, and live in new york. it would want to open up a coffee shop, and write books, and be well rounded in all areas of life. my emo side... lets call her MANDY would want to see every inch of Europe and become an art history major. Mandy would then have a style of a boho chic, who drank organic coffee, and had a colorful array of peasant skirts...Mandy would always long for rain and made sure that she was a florist/ jewelery designer/ mommy/ gardener/ artist of a girl.
i think Mandy took a huge part of my life in highschool.

now i am Sofy... the practical nursing side. who can not wait to work in a hospital. The one who seems to have most of her life figured out in aspects to her future life, with regards to a career.

everything is set, no surprises.

sometimes i scare myself. where did my free-spirited less practical, more of a dreamer side go? i never used to be like this. but as i get older, i don't know sometimes if i am just losing myself, or just getting older.
when did i stop thinking about opening up a coffee shop that was just like whit's end?
when did i become so Boring...? There seems to be no more surprises.
i want to be surprised again. i want to pretend and make believe again.

i am afraid sometimes that i may be losing my childlike enthusiasm for life, that i may end up regret. does that every make any sense at all?

i hate growing up.
why AM i so dang EMo today?

PMS??? maybe.... but it's too early.
i did cry twice today for the ugly betty and grey's anatomy episodes....

and i ate a tub of caramel pecan ice-cream.
i pig. me pig....

i may be slightly ADHD

why is ever so hard for me to concentrate on studying?

sometimes. this stuff seems so uninteresting and boring.

how did i ever survive college, with the study skills of an eight year old.

i sigh to my self, a hundred million times over.

i am going to eat pho tonight, that makes me happy.

i am a very unproductive person.

first post

i am here.
because i was fed up with the whole world reading my xanga.

i want to be able to write again as freely and as expressively as i want to. and not be worried about offending someone or being judged by someone i know... or plainly stated cuz my family reads my xanga entries.

sometimes i wish i was a lit. major or majored in some sort of language. nursing and science skills can be a grand bore.

i wish i only learned things that i like learning about.

i hunger for some good books and amazing pasta.

yadayadayada goes my heart...