car drive

i was talking to my dad. and he ended up asking me how my car was doing, since the stupid thing was causing me so much trouble in the last couple of days.

we made some small talk about cars, here and there. when i brought up the desire to one day own a honda accord. that was the only kind of car was drove, when we were still living in the states. and i guess for some reason that just brought back a flood of memories for my dad. he then started to talk about how when i was a baby they had to drive me around, till i fell asleep in the car. it was light blue accord ( i remember) and everytime they got to a stop light i would wake up screeching.
so whenever they needed me to calm me down they had to go driving...
he was speaking randomly and fondly...
that my throat tightened up so badly. conversations with mom doesn't usually illicit any form of tears or lump in the throat syndrome. but conversations with dad does, for some strange reason. maybe it's because somehow he always makes it sentimental or the talk diverts into either my safety/ well being or when i was little.

it was hard trying to not let the tears spill out, cuz i miss my parents both of them so much. that i forget, it just kind of goes away. however, conversations like those spark a crying fit. which just reminds me that i am still a BIG baby.

SIGH... argh.. what a day.

show reviews

okay so i watch alot of tv.
i dabble here and there, experimenting one week, and it also depends on how much time i have.

so here is what i have to say...

ugly betty:
its a complicated story line. really really twisted and full of secret tunnels and scandals. it's everything rolled into one. it has humor, romance, drama, suspense, and loads of comedy. i really fell in love with the first season, just because of betty's kind hearted nature and the transformation of daniel...
the only thing i am disgruntled about is her relationship with henry. they are cute, he is so cute. but hello he just got a girl pregnant and he is planning on going back to be with her to raise the kid. i don't know what they are thinking going on sleeping together like that. i thought betty was much smarter than that, but then again it show another more humane side of her that is a little be endearing.
they also recently added in a gay lover for mark, which is wierd. and i am not sure if i am totally comfortable with it yet to be honest with myself. i am still committed to this show and will get evermore sucked into the scandals of it all.

grey's anatomy;
it's getting old. however i only really watch it for christina yang and bailey's characters. the medical story lines are amazing and watching all the surgeries going on makes me excited. the story line is dumb. and i hate it how EVERYBODY is just sleeping with each other i lost count. meredith is lame and she needs to get out of her freaking retarded butt and make a committment to mcdreamy. she is so not mcdreamy's type and worth anyways. but she is always going through the same things, and i find her rather exhausting....
izzy and george makes me fume.... george because he made a mistake by getting married to the wrong girl and then sleeping with another while married. and izzy just cuz she thought it was ok for her to sleep with george and not feel humiliated by it. whatever they both go what they want, and i hope something bad happens to them both. i feel bad for callie... i think burke and addison was smart for leaving seattle grace.

private practice:
the staff here too is pretty deranged and messed up. especially the psychiatrist, she is the one who needs help getting over this allan fellow. i really don't think that she is in the right mind to be giving people mental advice, when she herself is clearly off the chart. and i also find it wierd that dell and naomi sort of have a thing but not really. i don't find it attractive at all but sorta of creepy.
he needs to hang out with ppl his own age. however i do like the medical storyline again, it is interesting and unique. even though i am not sure how realistic that it may be. one or two episodes did make me cry. so i gave me props for that. over all i don't get too sad if i miss an episode.

pushing daisies:
lee pace is CUTE for words. and chuck is annoying. but the overall feel of the show is whimsical and very endearing. i love the set, the costumes (chuck has the prettiest dresses), the characters are really unique. it is all in all a very sweet and creative story line. it's kinda of cute how chuck and ned can't touch each other.
but after a couple of episodes i am getting a little bored. its' the same storyline. of dead people and finding the murder. i have suddenly realized that i watch the show not for the story line but for the incredible set and graphics. it's again getting a little old. the only thing i will always love forever is digby the dog...

chuck:
he is so cute... the perfect cute nerd character ever.
again old... maybe because rather than it being a ever growing story it is one small story during every episode. chuck has vision, hot cia agent, and cold nsa agent save the day. he always has something cute to say that makes me laugh...
but i find his relationship with his sister annoying and unnatural. but i am ready and willing to see what more he can do.. and if he will ever break free from the buy more.

the office:
i laugh out loud as in belly laugh at least 3 times during each episode which is alot. but they are ridiculous and makes me really wonder if they are really people like that in the world. there are some great quotes that come from this show.. and it's heart warming in a creepy way.

i think that's about it.
i know i watch way too much.... but there are so many good thigns to watch out there.

i am NOT an open book

sometimes i feel like i lag, when it comes to talking about myself and being OPEN with other people.
as i observe people and their ability to communicate with other people, i marvel at how OPEN they can be. i thought it was easy and carefree for me to be able to share about me, to talk about my life, to literally be an open book.

however, i am not. rather i am a closed book, tightly locked with a key i only give to a very few (so few in fact) that it may not even count as few. i don't know why i am so protective like that, it is not like i ever got hurt or betrayed. or maybe i did, and i just don't remember.
for a while now i have been fooling myself into thinking that my life was a carefree, let everyone be involved sort of book.
actually people who have open book lifestyles annoy me and i find them exhausting.

so if i was a was a book, i would be hardcover. i would be the type of book the reader would have a hard time feeling comfortable with, won't have an easy paperback. the front cover would not consist of anything that would possibly entice a future reader. i think i would be a book easily passed over, because of the hard, rough exterior. my intro might be mundane and wordy; and the font is courier. it may even crackle and smell moldy... and it might take the reader awhile to become involved with my reading. i am not a paperback, comic sans font, or a teenybopper book. i am tightly bound, exterior harder than leather, maybe looking like a vintage rarity. that's the type of book i am.